Successful people are people who get things done. How do they get things done? They take risks, they think big, and they make and execute well-thought out plans. There’s something else they do that most people don’t think about: successful people ask for help.

    Call it what you will—building a team, outsourcing, collaborating, delegating, etc.—it all amounts to asking for help. And that is a critical factor in professional and personal success.

    Many of us are hardwired NOT to ask for help. We think it makes us appear weak. We think we have to be superwomen. We think people will say no. We think we have to do everything ourselves. Whatever the reason, we don’t ask for the help we need. We have to get over that, and here’s how:

    Get over yourself.No one—and I mean NO ONE—got anywhere alone. You cannot and should not do everything yourself. You are not, in fact, always the best person for the job, or the “only” person who can do it. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Asking for help clears space for you and frees your time and energy. It’s a smart strategy.

    Reframe your thinking.Reframe what it means to ask for help from “I am a weak, incompetent loser” to “I am strategically allocating my time to focus on what matters most.” Don’t dwell on the fact that you can’t do something or don’t have the time or expertise. Instead, think about what you will gain from the ask—a chance to connect, a chance to value a colleague, a chance to get something done faster or better, a chance to optimize your own time and talents.

    Know your colleagues. Asking for help is about tapping valuable resources to get the best outcome the most quickly with the fewest resources expended. That’s a fancy way of saying get the right people for the job. It’s all about building the right team. And the best way to do that is to know your colleagues, cultivate your networks, and proactively build relationships.

    Think about your colleagues: What are their strengths? Weaknesses? What have they been working on recently? Who works well together? Who leads well? Who follows well? The more you know about your colleagues the more effectively you can tap their wisdom and the better team you will build.

    Build your team. Before you embark on a project or task at work, think about the following questions:

    What is the scope of this project?

    When have I worked on a project like this?

    What did I learn and how can I leverage it?

    What do I need help with?

    Who is an expert in this area or has executed on this task?

    所谓成功者，就是能够把事情做好的人。如何把事情做好呢？他们敢于冒险，从大处着手，能够制定并执行经过深思熟虑的计划。还有一件事是大多数人没有想到的：成功者善于寻求帮助。

    组建团队、外包、协作、授权等等，虽然说法不同，但这些做法本质上都是寻求帮助。而且，寻求帮助是推动职业和个人成功的一个关键因素。

    不要他人帮助，是许多人的固定思维模式。我们认为这样做会让自己显得软弱。我们认为自己必须成为超人。我们以为会遭到拒绝。我们认为必须自己做好所有事情。不论出于怎样的理由，有需要的时候，我们总是拒绝求助。但我们必须克服这种错误的观念，以下是本文给出的建议：

    不要自以为是。没有人，我的意思是没有一个人，能仅靠自己就取得成功。你不可能也不应该事事亲力亲为。事实上，你往往并非某项工作的最佳人选或“唯一”能做这件事的人。寻求帮助是力量的表现，而非软弱。寻求帮助可以为你腾出空间，让你有更多的时间和精力。这是明智的策略。

    转变自己的思维。将对寻求帮助的看法，从“我是软弱的、没有能力的失败者”转变为“我在从战略上分配我的时间，以便专注于最重要的事情。”不要纠结于你无法做某件事，没有时间做，或不具备专业知识这类事实。相反，想一下寻求帮助能够给你带来什么——交际的机会，重视同事的机会，更快或更好完成某项工作的机会，优化自己的时间与才能的机会。

    了解自己的同事。寻求帮助，实际上是利用宝贵的资源，以最少的资源用最快的速度得到最好的结果。换句话说，就是让合适的人做合适的事。关键是组建合适的团队。而最好的方式，就是了解自己的同事，培养人际关系网络，主动建立关系。

    考虑一下自己的同事：他们的优点是什么？弱点呢？他们最近在做哪方面的工作？谁是优秀的团队合作者？谁是出色的领导者？谁是好的执行者？你对自己的同事了解得越多，就可以更有效地利用他们的智慧，建立更出色的团队。

    建立自己的团队。在开始一个项目或一项任务之前，考虑下面几个问题：

    该项目的范围是什么？

    我之前什么时候曾经参与过类似的项目？

    我从那个项目中学到了什么，我可以如何利用它？

    我需要哪些帮助？

    谁是这个领域的专家或曾经执行过该任务？

    Who would be a good fit for this project?

    If you know your colleagues, you’ll know who to go to for help.

    Frame the ask properly.Don’t say, “I am so swamped. I just don’t have time for this” or “I’m an idiot and can’t figure this out.” You need to frame the ask positively, so it is mutually beneficial. For example:

    “Mary, I was really impressed with the report you prepared for the board. Would you help me format my own report?”

    “Ted, your work last year on the Jenkins team was fantastic. Would you consider being on my team?”

    “Sarah, I think your leadership skills are tremendous. Would you consider chairing this committee?”

    Again, asking for help is about tapping valuable resources to get the best outcome the most quickly with the fewest resources expended. Let the person know that you are asking for help because you value their time and talent.

    Get an assistant. If you have an assistant at work, lucky you! He or she is your teammate, and you should be outsourcing as much as you can to that person. If you don’t have one, consider hiring a virtual assistant.

    I hired one two years ago and it changed my life. She handles things I never in a million years would have trusted anyone to do but me. But I got over myself and gave it a try, and it was the best business decision I ever made. Every day I create a capture list of projects, tasks, phone calls, etc., and then delegate to my assistant, who now handles the things I used to: uploading content to my website, drafting invoices, updating my data base, booking travel, booking appointments, etc. She does things better, faster, and more efficiently than I ever could, and I cannot believe how much it freed me to focus on other things. (I am a HUGE fan of zirtual.com, a site that helps you find virtual personal assistants).

    DO try this at home.We are so busy at work, only to come home to find so much more work to do. Rather than nag your partner or kids, try outsourcing at home, too. Think about all the things you could outsource or share the load: grocery shopping, getting the kids to school, scheduling appointments, cleaning the house, doing laundry, scanning photos, sending holiday cards, etc. I hired a home-helper who cooks, cleans, shops, organizes, babysits, etc.

    If you don’t want to or can’t hire someone to help out at home, at least be proactive about asking for and getting help. You do not have to do everything alone, so:

    Make a master list. List everything that has to get done at home, like laundry, grocery shopping, meal preparation, watering plants, taking out the garbage and recycling, etc.

    Assess the task and assign the doer. Who else besides you can help? Maybe it’s your partner, your kids, the neighbor’s kid. Find someone to do it and assign it to them.

    Make a system. Build a system for sharing tasks that is repeatable. This gives ownership to the doer, simplifies communication, and frees your weekends.

    Ask for help. It’s what smart, successful people do.

    Camille Preston is the founder and CEO of AIM Leadership. An executive coach and a psychologist, Preston has spent more than twenty years working with corporate leaders to make them more efficient (and happy) on the job. Follow her @CamilleP

    谁最适合这个项目？

    如果你了解自己的同事，你就会知道向谁寻求帮助。

    合理组织求助用语。不要说“我忙死了。没时间做这个”或“我笨死了，这个我弄不明白”。你应该使用积极正面的求助语言，将求助变成互惠互利的事情。例如：

    “玛丽，你给董事会准备的报告，给我留下了深刻印象。你能不能帮我修改一下报告的格式？”

    “泰德，你去年在詹金斯团队的工作非常出色。你是否愿意考虑加入我的团队？”

    “萨拉，我认为你的领导能力很了不起。你是否愿意考虑主持这个委员会？”

    正如前文所述，寻求帮助实际上是利用宝贵的资源，以最少的资源和最快的速度得到最好的结果。让对方知道，你之所以寻求帮助，是因为你重视他们的时间和才能。

    寻找一位助理。如果你有一名助理，那真是太幸运了。他或她是你的队友，你应该将工作尽可能外包给对方。如果没有助理，可以考虑聘用一位虚拟助理。

    一两年前，我曾聘用过一位虚拟助理，这件事改变了我的生活。她负责处理一些我一直认为只有自己才能做好，从不信任其他任何人的事务。但我说服自己进行了一次尝试，结果证明这是我做过的最有价值的商业决策。我会每天创建一个清单，其中包括项目、任务、电话等等，然后分配给我的助理，她现在帮我处理这些之前由我自己解决的事情：向我的网站上传内容、拟定发票、更新数据库、安排行程、安排预约等。她比我做得更好、更快、更高效。而且，我从这些事务中解脱出来，可以专注于其他事情，这给我带来了意想不到的好处。（我是zirtual.com网站的铁杆粉丝，该网站会帮助你找到虚拟私人助理。）

    将家务外包。我们的工作非常繁忙，结果回家后发现还有更多工作要做。与其不断地唠叨爱人或孩子，不妨在家也尝试一下外包。许多事情可以外包或找人分担：购买生活必需品、送孩子上学、安排预约、打扫房屋、洗衣服、扫描照片、发送节日贺卡等。我曾聘用过一位家庭助手，帮助我做饭、清洁、购物、整理、照看孩子等。

    如果你不想或无法聘请他人帮忙做家务，至少要主动寻求帮助。你不必一个人去做所有事情，所以：

    制作一个总清单。列出必须要完成的所有家务，比如洗衣服、购物、准备饭菜、给植物浇水、扔垃圾和垃圾回收等。

    然后对任务进行评估，并分配给执行者。除了你之外，有谁能帮忙？或许是你的爱人、你的孩子、邻居的孩子等等。找到能做这些事情的人，并将任务进行分配。

    形成一个制度。建立一种可以重复的任务分担制度。这样一来，任务执行者就有了自主权，沟通过程得以简化，而你的周末也能被解放出来。

    寻求帮助。聪明的、成功的人都会这么做。

    本文作者卡米尔•普雷斯顿为领导力培训公司AIM Leadership的创始人兼CEO。作为一名高管导师和心理学家，普雷斯顿曾在20多年间与许多家公司的领导人合作，帮助他们提高了工作效率（和幸福感）。请关注@CamilleP（财富中文网）

    译者：刘进龙/汪皓