The MPW Insiders network is an online community where the most thoughtful and influential people in business contribute answers to timely questions about careers and leadership. Today’s answer to the question: At work, what’s the right way to say no? is written by Sue Quackenbush, chief human resources officer at Vonage.

Saying “no” is one of the most difficult things to say—especially in the workplace. Many people often commit to things they either cannot deliver on, or end up putting themselves in a difficult position rather than just saying no from the get go. But there are ways to say no and still be viewed as collaborative. It’s all about balance and being firm. You can still maintain successful work relationships with an honest “no” and not feel guilty about it.

The bottom line: You have to look at your workload and responsibilities and make an honest assessment of whether it’s a “yes” or a “no” so that you don’t put yourself—or the person asking for help—in a bad position.

Here’s what you can do to effectively decline a request for help:

• First, understand the ask. Have those asking for help share the significance of the request and why they came to you for help. The dialogue may reveal that someone else is better suited to help, that there’s a better approach, or that the request isn’t urgent.

• Second, acknowledge the importance of their ask, but show them the relative prioritization of their ask in your world. You can do this by sharing with them what’s currently on your plate and what you’ve already committed to deliver on.

• Third, respectively decline their request and provide them with alternative sources of help.

If that doesn’t work, apologize, but be firm and respectfully tell them that you’re not in a position to help with the particular request. After you say no, thank them for understanding why you had to decline, and reinforce your openness to provide support in the future.

At the end of the day, saying no is about setting boundaries while maintaining your relationships with colleagues. Even when saying no, the interaction provides an opportunity to better understand your colleagues and build or strengthen your relationships with them. Understandably, this isn’t easy to do, but when done with care and respect, the act of saying no can actually be beneficial for both parties.

MPW内部网络是一个在线社区，最有思想、最具影响力的商界人士将在此回答关于职业与领导力的问题。今天我们的问题时：在工作中，说“不”的正确方式是什么？以下为Vonage首席人力资源官苏•奎肯布什的回答。

说“不”从来都是最困难的事情之一——尤其是在职场上。许多人不会从最开始便说“不”，而是经常做出自己做不到的承诺，或者最终让自己陷入困境。事实上，有许多说“不”的方式，反而可以让人觉得你善于合作。关键是要做到平衡和态度坚决。只要诚实地说“不”，不会为此感到愧疚，你便能始终维持成功的工作关系。

底线在于：你需要了解自己的工作负担和职责，诚实地评估应该说“是”还是说“不”，避免让自己或向你寻求帮助的人陷入糟糕的境地。

通过下列方式，你可以有效拒绝他人的求助：

• 首先，了解对方的请求。询问向你求助的人，他们的请求的重要性，以及他们为什么向你寻求帮助。通过对话或许可能找到比你更适合提供帮助的人，有更好的解决办法，或者你会发现对方的请求并不紧迫。

• 其次，确认请求的重要性，告诉对方他们的请求在你的日程中的相对位置。你可以告知对方你手头的任务，以及你已经保证要完成的承诺。

• 最后，用尊重的态度拒绝对方的请求，并提供可以帮助对方的替代选择。

如果不成功，说声抱歉，然后用坚决但有礼貌地语气告诉对方，你现在无法提供他们请求的帮助。在拒绝之后，感谢对方理解你拒绝的理由，并向对方强调未来你依旧愿意提供支持。

总而言之，说“不”就是划定界限，同时维持与同事的关系。即便在拒绝的时候，你与同事的交流也可以为你提供机会，更深入地了解你的同事，建立或增强与对方的关系。当然，说“不”并非易事，这不难理解，但如果以关心和尊重的态度说出这个字，反而可以给双方带来好处。 （财富中文网）

译者：刘进龙/汪皓