今天你要衡量些什么? / What Will You Measure Today?

今天你要衡量些什么?

每一天,我们每个人面前都摆着很多选择,但它们经常被一大堆习惯、任务、差使、干扰和一个又一个的截止日期所湮没。

原因就是这些散布在每一天的选择可能不是那么显眼,不过这不意味着它们就不存在。如今的生活节奏里弥漫着咖啡因,以至于让我们忽略掉很多重要的事情。

真正的成功者会养成一种自律,定期从各种纷忙杂乱中抽身,回头检视什么才是最重要的事,并据此确定和调整自己的优先度。这其中包括让思想聚焦,选出哪些事物值得衡量,哪些不值。

可以选来衡量的事项几乎无所不包,比如体重、个人资产的变化、昨晚睡觉的时间、所签合同的价值、写作的字数、投资的回报、健身消耗掉的卡路里、KPI的完成进度、腰围等等。

很少有人会习惯于每天早晨都问自己一遍“今天我要衡量什么”,其实他们错过了一个机会,就像开车没有看指南针或GPS导航一样。

很多人对自我价值的衡量主要是基于外在的成就,比如考试得分、销售业绩、工作考评、学历证书、工资增长等等。

我并不是说这些就不重要。在求学和工作中,这些都非常重要,但用它们来衡量人生的整体成功或保持自尊是不全面的。有时我们忘记了,自信就像油箱里的汽油,需要定期加满。

那么,能不能用为人来衡量自我价值呢?看看我们能对邻居、同事、朋友、家人展现多少善意,花费多少心思?我们今天是不是以出乎意料的善意关怀给某人带来了惊喜?这些都值得我们停下来,并悄悄庆祝一番。

人们很容易过分注重有形的、实际的度量标准,但对善意的衡量却是模糊的、相对的,也不一定是科学的。但这并不意味着就该将它从对日常生活的衡量中剔除出去。

我们还很容易被裹挟,沉迷于对错误事物的衡量无法自拔。比如内个谁谁谁的车子、鞋子、手表、房子——不论什么——都比我炫,比我贵。最终让我们的追求沦为仓鼠轮上的奔跑,虽然一刻未停,却从未前进半步。

最重要的选择不一定是大事,也不一定要冒险,相反很多都是小事,却会带来很大的不同。

比如,你可以尝试一下这些:今天我要当个好听众、我要更有耐心、我要更多地与爱人独处,我要考虑自己今天的优先度可能并不一定是最重要的事。

我们每迈出一小步,都会对身边的世界造成很大的影响,就像在池塘中投入一枚石子,会激起圈圈涟漪。

另一方面,有许多事我们不能衡量,也不应尝试去衡量。

这其中就包括爱。真爱无需衡量。

还有悲伤。认为凭自己的经历就可以判断或比较他人的悲伤是错误的,因为我们永远无法穿越悲伤的丛林并了解它的深度。认可和敬畏才是最好的方式。

总之,你在明天、后天、乃至今后每一天将要衡量什么?这个问题值得认真思考。

What Will You Measure Today?

Every day presents us each a host of choices, although they are often buried beneath a mountain of habits, tasks, errands, interruptions, and deadlines.

Just because each day’s choices may not be obvious doesn’t mean they’re not there. The pace of life is so caffeine-laced, that we tend to overlook a lot of important things.

Really successful people develop a discipline for regularly stepping back from the hustle bustle, reflecting on what’s important, and then setting and adjusting priorities. That includes focusing on choices about what’s worth measuring and what’s not.

Options about what to measure are almost limitless: we can measure our physical weight, the change in the value of our assets, the length of time we slept last night, the value of contracts we signed, the number of words we wrote, the return on our investment, calories burned at the gym, progress towards our KPIs at work, our waist size, and so on.

Very few people are in the habit of asking themselves each morning “What will I measure today? ” That’s a missed opportunity, like failing to look at the compass or GPS while navigating a vehicle.

Many people measure their own self-worth primarily based on external achievements, such as test scores, sales results, job appraisals, degrees earned, salary increases, etc.

I’m not saying these things are not important. They are very important in our studies and careers, but they are an incomplete framework for measuring overall success in life, or for maintaining self-esteem. We sometimes forget that self-confidence is like gasoline in the fuel tank. It requires topping up on a regular basis.

What about also measuring our self-worth by the kind of person we are, as demonstrated by the kindness and consideration we show to our neighbors, colleagues, friends and family members? Did we surprise someone with unexpected kindness today? That’s cause for pause, and quiet celebration.

It’s easy to get overly focused on more tangible, objective metrics. Measuring kindness is fuzzy, relative, and not very scientific. That doesn’t mean we should exclude it from consideration when we think about what we’re going to measure in our daily lives.

We also tend to get swept up into measuring the wrong stuff and obsessing over it. So and so’s car, shoes, watch, house — whatever — is fancier or more expensive than mine. That ultimately leads us into a pursuit like the hamster running in place on his hamster wheel. Good exercise, but going nowhere meaningful.

Not all important choices are big, audacious ones. Lots of them are small, but they can still make a big difference.

For example, try this one: I’m going to be a better listener today. Or, I’m going to try to be more patient today. Or, I’m going to spend more one-on-one time with my loved ones today. Or, I’m going to consider that maybe my priorities today are not automatically the most important ones.

Small steps we take can have a big impact on the world around us , like the ripples made when you throw a stone into in the pond.

On the other hand, there are some things we cannot measure and shouldn’t bother trying.

One of them is love. True love defies measurement.

Another is grief. It is a mistake to think we can judge or compare our experience of grief to the grief of another person, for we can never penetrate that jungle or understand its depths. It’s best to just acknowledge and respect it.

In any case, it’s worth thinking carefully about what you’re going to measure tomorrow, the day after, and the day after that.


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